Quotes of the year December 27, 2012

Muesli, murder, and Martian visitors

Who said what and about whom: the agony of being KP, talking stumps, hamburger-stopping, and more

"Peter Siddle's first Test wicket."
Peter Siddle's answer to the question: "How would you describe Sachin Tendulkar?"

"It's not the first time Michael Clarke has given up chasing Lara."
ABC commentator Jim Maxwell got cheeky as Clarke declared the Australia innings with his score an unbeaten 329

"You die, you die. You don't see which is the better way to die."
MS Dhoni on whether a whitewash in Australia would hurt more than the one in England

"I'm waiting on clearance from bcci to play in the 4th Test against Australia."
Chris Gayle volunteered on Twitter to revive India's fortunes Down Under

"There are people out there digging holes for a living and we're actually playing cricket. So stop whingeing."
Brad Hogg, in response to Melbourne Stars coach Greg Shipperd's criticism of the BBL scheduling

"The stumps have asked for pads."
Kerry O'Keeffe on radio when Rahul Dravid walked out to bat in the second innings at Adelaide Oval, having been bowled six times in seven innings till then in the series

"If I get paid then I don't mind paying 10%."
Mahela Jayawardene joked about Sri Lankan players' wage problems after being fined for showing dissent at an umpire's decision

"It hasn't yet sunk in yet but I've definitely lost around 50 kilos."
Sachin Tendulkar admitted a weight was off his shoulders after he finally got his 100th international century

"Unfortunately I was born with a straight arm."
Ravi Shastri when asked by a co-commentator in the IPL if he didn't have a quicker delivery

"Watching some of the bowlers' actions today, I think I might have created a monster."
Former Sri Lanka captain Arjuna Ranatunga on the unintended fallout of defending Muttiah Muralitharan's action

"I had more adrenaline out there in one night than I did in 17 years of cricket."
Adam Hollioake said he found cricket "boring" after his first professional cage fight

"When someone gets a stomach upset, it's because of the IPL. If someone gets an outside edge, it's because of the IPL."
Ravi Shastri thought there was a limit to the number of things you can blame the IPL for

"My choice as captain would be me."
MS Dhoni evaded a question on his successor as India captain

"Onions? Well, he has a few things to say. Give me back Jimmy Anderson. I don't like Onions. I don't use it in my food."
Marlon Samuels wasn't too impressed with Graham Onions' sledging

"If people call you 'a Ferrari without a steering wheel', at least you are a Ferrari. That means you are quality. They are not calling you a Toyota Prius."
Tino Best on advice former England fast bowler Devon Malcolm gave him

"I don't expect Jesse to have heard of me too much. I have a reasonably intelligent audience."
New Zealand sports broadcaster Mark Watson taunted Jesse Ryder ahead of their boxing match

"I had always asked him to have his hair cut, but he never listened to me. Then how was he ready to do such a big thing [at my behest]?"
Salman Butt said he wasn't behind Mohammad Amir's spot-fixing

"I never understood whether the word 'amnesty' is correct or not. Maybe I am not very intelligent but I checked the dictionary to find the meaning."
Kapil Dev was not too pleased with his return to the BCCI fold being termed an amnesty

"We're really good at sitting on our butts and going backwards."
Simon Doull had an explanation for New Zealand's rowing medals at the Olympics

"It's tough being me."
Kevin Pietersen on his struggle to balance his love for Test cricket with what he described as England's internal team politics

"I reckon 90% of players, particularly the batters, will tell you that the game they enjoy playing most is T20, but they mightn't admit it in public."
Matthew Hayden offered his view of the players' favourite format in the midst of the Kevin Pietersen saga

"I can guarantee that in 125 of his 134 matches he went to shower just before the batsman ahead of him went in."
Sourav Ganguly on a peculiar habit of VVS Laxman's

"I'm not even the second-best batsman in my team."
Hashim Amla didn't agree with the world rankings for batsmen

"On the 1996 tour of England, I went to the gym only once - to see it, not to use it."
Sourav Ganguly provided insight into the Indian team's attitude to fitness training in his early days

"If that'd been a hamburger he'd have stopped it."
Bob Willis had a dig at a misfield by plump Ian Blackwell in the Clydesdale Bank40 final at Lord's

"What a waste of four days that was."
Vernon Philander on his trip to Colombo for the ICC awards, where he didn't win any of the three awards he was nominated for

"I am going to spend it with the West Indian women's team."
Chris Gayle revealed his plans for his 33rd birthday

"PCB chairmen are complex. They are airdropped from Mars."
Shoaib Akhtar on the Pakistan cricket administration

"Now I find myself coming in after Rahul, a job so huge that India has traditionally left it to Sachin Tendulkar. By that marker, I can really only disappoint."
Gideon Haigh on delivering the Bradman Oration the year after Dravid did

"Where else in the world do you get the opportunity to basically kill someone with two bouncers an over? Or try, legally."
Dale Steyn said cricket brings out the aggressor in him

"Muesli… the aggression builds up gradually."
Sachin Tendulkar revealed what he ate for breakfast before his brief but brutal attack against Glenn McGrath in the Champions Trophy 2000

"I think Glenn's wasted his 25 cents there... how much does a tweet cost, Brett?"
Mark Taylor is not a Twitter person, as his query to Brett Lee on a Glenn McGrath tweet, while on TV commentary, revealed

"Umpires get handsome payments. They are supposed to take some decisions."
MS Dhoni defends his decision not to recall Jonny Bairstow after he was given out due to an umpiring error

"Only those who've played at least 150 Tests should be analysing Sachin's game."
Bishan Bedi, who played 67 Tests, disqualified himself from the Tendulkar debate

"We didn't have anti-perspirants back then."
Sunil Gavaskar explained why there were no team huddles in his playing days

Nishi Narayanan is a staff writer at ESPNcricinfo